Your Child Isn't an Accessory


I'm not a perfect person, nor will I ever be. I'm not ever a perfect mom, nor will I ever be! That's not even the point of this blog. It's for encouragement and dialogue and a place for my sisters and I to stay connected since we're so far apart.  it's a place to share our failures and crazytimes.... 

But one thing in particular has been on my heart lately, that's been all over social media for a few years now seems like.  

Why has motherhood become a trend? Why should such a calling, something that requires all of you be something that you just pick and choose what you like about it. Your kids aren't accessories. They're not sitting in your closet waiting for you to give them attention. 

They're human beings! 

They shouldn't have to wonder if their parents love their jobs and night life more than they love them. They shouldn't be made to feel like a burden because they just aren't meeting your expectations. 

Some babies are in daycare 40+ hours a week, then given to a babysitter to be kept almost every night so the parents can go out! I don't understand. I am all about needing a break every now and then; but who's raising your kids here? It's not the parents in this situation. .. it's the daycare worker and the babysitters and the iPad no doubt. 

Your kids aren't a burden, and if you feel that way then maybe put yourself in their shoes for two seconds. Would you want a mom that never wanted to be around you? That always acted annoyed when you had a need or want? 

Your kids need you mom. You only get one chance at this. Let's do our best and be the ones that our kids know that we love them more than any human in this earth ever will. 

Everything you need to know.

Everything you need to know you can learn from a child.  




Adults are too busy, stressed, overwhelmed, and distracted to even notice just how immensely different we approach our days from our "childish" counterparts.  


At some point in our growth, a disconnect occurs. We usually exchange a life of carefree joy for a set of our first house keys. The pressures of adulthood, the point at which every child cannot wait to reach to "do whatever we want", is life-sucking, at best. 


But does it really have to be this way?! Are we doomed to live the bulk of our days under the weight of piles of bills and responsibilities?!  


I used to believe this was just how life was. Adults are grumpy, old, fun-suckers and children are energetic, playful, and completely ignorant. They just need to "grow up", afterall. 


I digress.  


I have witnessed the cosmic clashing of adult maturity and know-how, and childlike imagination and excitement more times than I can count.  


And it's somewhat painful to watch. 


Adults lack imagination, creativity, and the energy to keep up with children.

And why are they always so daggone happy and hungry and bouncy-bouncy?!? 

Because to them, each day is a gift from God. 

They wake up perky as they giggle and quickly trapse down the hallways each morning at first light. 

To them, work is play and play is your work isn't play to them and they don't understand why you have no interest in building sand-castles or a game of tag. 


You're tired. I get it. I'm tired, too.

How many times do you see a toddler fall before they actually walk five steps?! Countless. They never give up.

Neither should we.

They want the extra waters and bedtime stories because they aren't ready to put away the present of today. It's still new to them, sleep is a death sentence to their zest and they want you to crave more of the day with them.

They're wise. Goodness, they're wise. I learn more from my children than they ever do from me. 

Because I have yet to remember that each day is still a gift. Whether that day is filled with bills or frustrations, how I choose to deal with those things is my responsibility.

Maybe we just need to build our own sand castles and swing as high as the trees too, because to forget that life is a gift is to forget that all those breaths you're breathing today mean something. 


So breathe. And let the breath become laughter. And let the laughter carry you to notice that children are the greatest life teachers and you are have become their pupil.

love, Alicia